Blueberry

Sebby messaged me in the morning asking to meet within these few days.
= )
Aint got the slightest pint of adrenalin.
Nope, not even a wee bit.
First person i met upon reaching school wuz Levin.
Gave me chiclets and blueberry gum. Yay!
Thought of having it during lecture.
But then again, i din go for lecture. hahahah
All the travelling to school was for naught.
I din bring my MCs.
G.......R............E.........A............T.......
I'm such a klutz!
Practically went school JUZ FOR LUNCH.
Grrrrrr........
But had my choc tutu. heh.......
Saw Ber and Jan.
Jan gave me this peculiar look.
What the hell's wrong with him?
If he cant take rejetions well, why even try so hard?
Go slap your own balls if you have nuthin to do.
Don't go hitting on girls.
Headed down town with my Christyl instead.
Bought a top.
Lazed at Starbucks... where there's lotsa old ti gos...
"Old yuppies" as Christyl terms them.
She's never going there again! ahhaha......
Supposed to meet Chris and Dar,
but Christyl cudn't stay fer long.
So i went to meet Dad for dinner.
Din eat much...no appetite.
Then i saw this big red bag......
And a blue codroy cap......
Contemplate.......
Should just glue my eyes up eh....
Anyway, that Fish is coming back...think tonight.
Shit ass!

Peeking into the world of CANCER

With her soft translucent skin and lovely shoulders, your Cancer lover makes a knockout entrance to any club wearing her sleek, dӄlletage slip dress, as only a Cancer lady could carry off. But in case you think you can easily date this beauty, be forewarned that she is no pushover. The Cancer woman is careful about who she gives her heart to, because once she commits, she gives her all. Your lunar lady is truly feminine, and lucky for you, of all the signs, Cancer is the most nurturing and protective of those close to her.

Your Challenge
Her ruler, the moon, rules the changing emotions--so she can be a moody person. This may make it hard to figure out how she feels about you in the early days of your relationship, because at times your stock will appear to rise and fall. If you marry her, this will not be a problem for she will be very loyal to you, and often put your interests ahead of hers. Your lunar goddess takes responsibility seriously. If she is a single mother, her children will come first, and you may have to wait in line. Yet it is this side of her--her mothering instincts--that you probably find so appealing in her.

How To Handle Her
Nothing comes before her spouse and her children in a Cancer woman`s life and thus, she often she forgets her own needs. Here is where you can lavish attention on her. She is a bit of a worrier, and will often second-guess herself about decisions she has made. Reassure her that her judgment is sound, and help her focus more on the future, less on the past. (Cancer rules tradition, and this why she is so marvelous about creating a warm and loving family life--she knows she is building memories!) Holidays and birthdays are important to her, so don`t put her down for wanting to make them special. Instead, support her.

If she seems down and suddenly you find yourself on the outs with her, talk gently with her to get back into her good graces. Harsh tactics would be the wrong approach to take with her. Keep your temper under control and don`t be demanding. Her gentle feelings over-respond to criticism and in the heat of argument you could say something which could crush her irreparably. Cancers have excellent memories and she will remember everything you said, unfortunately whether you meant it or not.

Things To Do, Gifts To Buy
The Cancer woman`s home is her nest and is highly important to her. Offer to paint her living room or to give her a hand moving furniture around if she wants a new look. If she is divorced with kids, take everyone on an outing (she will be thunderstruck that you are attentive of her children, and love you for the gesture). Later, help her locate a baby-sitter and take her to a small and cozy family-run restaurant where the food is delicious and the lights are low. (Cancers are not comfortable in large, high-key, fancy places. She wants to focus on you, not the surroundings.) If your table has a view overlooking water, so much the better, for water rejuvenates Cancer in a way that other signs simply can`t fathom.

The Cancer woman will enjoy reminiscing, so think about recreating the first time you made love together, perhaps by going back to the same place or by celebrating the anniversary. Or, give her a beautiful album filled with snapshots of the two of you that you`ve been collecting.

When making love, the Cancer woman is fragile and feminine. Because she often puts others first, a little pampering would be a smart idea. To seduce her properly, whip up a surprise gourmet dinner and serve it to her on a small table decorated with flowers and white table linens set up in the bedroom, a place she isn`t used to eating. Have chocolate-covered strawberries for dessert and feed her each by hand, one by one. Hide a love note or special card under her plate--Cancers are sentimental. Be especially careful about what you say to her during lovemaking, for anything she construes as negative could hurt her deeply---teasing is not for her.

Give her an exquisite strand of pearls (Cancer is a crab, a little sea creature like the pearl oyster) or a skimpy, slinky, expensive nightgown in one of her moon colors--silver, creamy white or pale, smoky blue. She would also adore flowers--but instead of sending her red or pink roses, make your bouquet a variety of flowers in Cancer`s color--snow white--tied with a gorgeous thick white satin ribbon.

You`ll eventually discover (if she likes you) that she has beautiful, firm, fully-rounded breasts (the part of the body the sign rules) which, in bed, she adores having her man fondle and admire. Paint them with thousands of kisses and caress them gently.

The pain is almost excruciating.
This emptiness is flooding with emotions.
My heart is sinking.
It's exfoliating....
Till its core is exposed.
Gone.

Shattered dreams deprive my soul,
The yearning for to which i cannot gain.
Lingering in self-denial,
my mind plays it's sorrowful tune.
The horizon of truth in shrouded clarity,
i wonder when my turn will come.
Twisting in my own bewilderment,
i long to feel again.
But fear that day may never come.
I dwell in joyfull sadness to see but not to feel,
to listen but not to hear.
Sweet melody to my deaf ears. I want to hear but can never experience.
Longing...